Below, we have set out below some practical considerations to assist separated parents when trying to agree the arrangements for children over the festive period (and any other significant dates and holidays).

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1.   Communications – the sooner the better

Set out the plans and principles of the arrangement in advance. This is something to consider early on into your separation, and make sure it is understood by all involved. The more firmed up a plan is, the more likely it will be adhered to. Of course, last minute changes do happen and it is important to be flexible, but where possible, these discussions should take place openly and early on.

2.   Working patterns

Remember that every family is different and has different working patterns. The children will be off from school before Christmas Eve and into the New Year – working parents have other considerations, such as annual leave allowances, shift patterns and being on call. Therefore, it is important to be open with one another and have a dialogue about availability and what will work in practice.

3.   There is no set formula

Just because your friend who is separated from their co-parent has an arrangement where they alternate Christmas and New Year every year, that doesn’t mean it will work for your family.  Each family has different needs and parameters on what is feasible. Working together to find the approach that works for everyone is involved can be challenging, but it is important to not restrict yourself to a specific expectation about what will take place and have an open mind when discussing this with your co-parent. ‍

4.   Logistics

The practical reality of the holiday period that is often forgotten is the distance between homes and the implications travelling significant distances will have on the children. Whilst some co-parents who only live a short distance apart may choose to split Christmas Day in half, for those that live further apart, this just won’t be practical for them or the child(ren). When faced with this scenario, parents should have the children at the forefront of their mind and the reality of how they will be spending their whole holiday period.

5.   Consideration to blended families

Blended families are extremely common,and there often needs to be consideration of step and half siblings, and how they will be spending the holiday period too. It is natural to want all the children to be together on these special days or at least a cross over of the time they are spending over the holiday periods. Again, communication and transparency are key in facilitating this in the most practical way possible.This goes back to firming up the plans as early as possible and factoring these elements into the discussion around arrangements.

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Whilst these top tips are intended to assist you in reaching an agreement with your co-parent between yourselves, in the event that you do run into problems and cannot reach an agreement, we do suggest you seek specialist legal advice as soon as practicable. There are other options available that we can talk you through, which include:

1.   Family mediation;

2.   Negotiations through solicitors;

3.   Family arbitrations; and, as a last resort

4.   Court proceedings.

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For any query or further information on the matters covered in this insight, please do not hesitate to contact family@sheridans.co.uk.